Is It Okay to Spit in Public?

The Dream: The dream begins with a group of people in an old-fashioned apartment building. We exit as a group. As we walk down a hallway I decide to stop by the ladies' room. The door is open, and I wonder if it's actually the ladies—as opposed to the gents. It is, and I go in. Later I'm again looking for the ladies room and realize I'm in the men's section of the building. I see a comfortable-looking men's lounge with stuffed chairs, very clubby looking. The nearby restroom is the men's. I leave the area, feeling socially uncomfortable about my trespass.

Once outside I see a gravel path leading away from the main sidewalk and going into a treed area. I see EH on the path, brushing her teeth. I am also brushing my teeth. I wonder if I should go back to the ladies' room in order to have a place to spit.

Interpretation: This dream seems to be about the unconscious attempting to come to terms with gender. As it begins I'm in a communal setting—with a group of people in an apartment. The apartment is old-fashioned, indicating that the dream is looking back to the time in my youth when gender roles were strictly defined. As I find myself confused about which room is for women and which for men—more than once—I struggle to define where I should be. What  sort of behavior is right for me?

I leave this social confusion for the rough (gravel) road of figuring it out for myself. I see an acquaintance along this path, brushing her teeth. According to Tony Crisp, one of the many things teeth can represent in a dream are words—things we've said, things we wish we hadn't said. As I brush my teeth I might be trying to polish or perfect some of these, but I'm left with a dilemma: I find I need to spit. Crisp sees spit as a carrier of strong feelings, such as love or hate. At this point I'm too entrenched in what's considered ladylike to express these feelings, so I have to revisit the “ladies' room” before I can spit it out.

Bogart or Redford: The Pub

When you have a very long dream, one way to begin to understand it is to break it down into sections and then work on one at a time. That’s what I’m going to do with this dream. Once you’ve explored each section in depth the meaning of the entire dream becomes clear.

Dream Scene 1: Robert Redford and I are in love. I am Jane Fonda, or someone very much like her. Redford and I are going to rendezvous in a pub-like setting. Sometimes this pub looks like a bar right out of the Old West, and sometimes it looks more like an English tearoom.

The proprietor of the pub has recently redecorated. I observe this as I attempt to use the toilet. Each time I go into the hallway to look for an empty john someone scoots in before me. As I wait I notice that the proprietor has put up Jacobean flowered wallpaper off the hallway in the dining area. The wallpaper and the redecoration are pretty, but look superficial, slapped on.

Interpretation: The first two characters, Robert Redford and Jane Fonda, are actors who were in their prime during my young adulthood. If asked to describe them I would say they are attractive, superficial, and representative of the new vision of masculinity and femininity that was evolving at that time.  The pub (public house) indicates the dream is dealing with my relationship to society, and its features again reflect the masculine (50s Westerns) and the feminine (an English tea room). Searching for the toilet indicates I’d like some privacy; I wish I could get away from the social pressure of the “pub.” As for the redecorating—what am I trying to cover up? Are the changes I’ve made so far superficial?